This is a collection of thoughts and statements about things that annoy me. I am a big, angry man. Hear me roar, or piss off and give me peace.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Edinburgh is a shite place to live...

It's official.

The BBC reports that the happiest places to live have been mapped out.

"Edinburgh, despite its cosmopolitan reputation and internationally acclaimed fringe festival, was bottom of the list."

That would be because there are hardly any locals in the city... And those folk who do live here, have to battle through hordes of tourist filth clogging up the streets for one month of constant fireworks, flyers and irritating cunts talking about how great their show is, would you like a free ticket?

"Staying in an area for five years or longer was an important indicator of well being, said the scientists."

Edinburgh will have a lot of transient student types (the ones I complain about coming here, voting Labour, and second vote green, and fucking off again.) So this will add weight to the <5 years lot. I came here as student filth in 1996, and left (after graduation) for a brief spell of steak, weak beer and guns in Austin, Texas. I came back though.

And here I still am. And I am here because Edinburgh is actually a great place to live. Great socially, great to catch up with pals after work for a pint. Great to wander round the city, soak in the atmosphere, architecture and ambience... (When you can get moving when the tourists are away).

The trouble with living in Edinburgh is continually being bent over and fucked by the cuntcil. Who know better than everyone...

"Objectors ... have claimed it could jeopardise the city's World Heritage site status."

Didn't the chaps who came to visit us from UNESCO say this themselves?

Edinburgh's design champion Sir Terry Farrell told BBC Scotland: "Edinburgh is changing, it is becoming a bigger city in every sense, it's being recognised as a force in urban cities in Europe and in Great Britain."

Edinburgh has always been a great city historically... We know these things, we live here... The question is - do you? Do you use public transport in the city? Do you walk anywhere in the city? Do you talk to people who actually live and work here?

Do you fuck.

"It also has the tram and the waterfront, these are big changes."

Big changes? Big disruptions. Big waste of money.

We don't have trams. We've got fucking massive holes in the road. We have roadworks. We have ambulances delayed at junctions due to shite traffic management in the troubled times. We've got listed buildings being demolished. We've got businesses up in arms due to massive restrictions on loading and unloading - reductions in custom due to these works.

You can shove the trams right up your arse. And if you like the waterfront so much, fuck off and live there yourself. You'll find the bus service is well adequate, no trams necessary, thanks very much. You'll find that the whores like the area too.

It would be nice if the council asked the people what they wanted, rather than taking unilateral decisions on the behalf of the political classes in the city.


Mark said...

Apparently Cumbernauld is one of the top 5 most cheerful places in britain. Also this quote makes me think the BBC are making news where there is none: "However, the researchers stress that the variations between different places in Britain are not statistically significant."
So, umm, do calm down. It's not like they stuck a finger in your ear :D

Grant said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Grant said...

Excellent rant, Steve. However, until property numbskulls Phil & Kirsty agree with this research it surely has to be taken with a pinch of salt? ;-)

milo said...

Amen brother. Have you seen how hideous the Haymarket plans are?

Anonymous said...

Actually as Mark said what's more annoying here is the BBC making an easy story out of a crap survey "However, the researchers stress that the variations between different places in Britain are not statistically significant."

Still it's not a bad reason to have a rant at the council (who have fucked up so badly we 're now getting all the work on our flat for free.)

and I don't actually think that the last set of haymarket plans I saw was too bad?

milo said...

Chris: It's not the station plans (which keep changing) that are horrible. It's the massive hotel and "travel lodge" that they've just given planning permission for.

Mike Smith said...

Well I live in Edinburgh (okay - Dalkeith to be accurate) and I used to live in Cumbernauld.

And I love them both!

I'll get me coat...

Angry Steve said...

@ Mike Smith....

What's it called?

Aye, fuck off until you live somewhere that's been here for longer than five minutes.

(cheers for the comment, we should go for a drink)

Mike Smith said...

Sounds good to me. Drop me an e-mail.

1st Lady said...

"Edinburgh apparently the most miserable place in Britain", what a load of baloney. After living 12yrs in America I've chosen to move back to Edinburgh, for good, in 2 weeks. And I'll be the 4th generation of my family thats lived in the city, and generally, as a rule, we dont choose shite places to live.

These surveys are never held accountable for their 'results', and thats the problem.

Johnny said...

What Edinburgh needs to do is set up the Old Tollbooth the way it used to be and keep stringing up councillors until the survivors start to get a clue. And a fair few MSPs while we're at it.

It would be a good bit of local colour for the tourists anyhoo.

Dr Evil said...

I lived in Edinburgh with my wife and the beginnings of my young family back in 1984-87. Great place physically, people..........nasty and unpleasant (Fairmile Head, a posh bit of Edinburgh too, but hey, we are English). Best bit of Edinburgh was the A1 South back to England. Shove your festival too, it's actually not very good.

Anonymous said...

I'm from Musselburgh just outside Edinburgh. Well if you don't like it foxtrot oscar and screw you. I love the place and its the capital of the the land of the free......stick that in your pipe and smoke it!!!

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